From ERROR MSGChapter Eight: THE Listening Practice

Hearing Through the Din

Sometimes it feels as if no one is listening particularly well these days. Soaring decibels, overscheduled days, worsening traffic, and constant demands that have to be met right this instant are just some of the things that make people shut off their receivers and pull inward.

As a lawyer, your problem is probably compounded by the fact that--unless you're a rare case--you were never taught to listen. You were taught to advocate, but your teachers almost certainly neglected to mention that the roots of successful advocacy are in listening. This makes it difficult to advocate for the whole client, rather than just for a narrow interpretation of what his or her interests are--that is, for the person rather than simply for the anger or the hurt, or even for the money that may be at stake.

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The Characteristics of Listening

Most lawyers see their job as getting to a solution, fast. Once they think they've got it, they tend to stop listening. Once the raw facts have gelled into something recognizable, it's time to forge ahead, to do whatever research is necessary, draft the relevant documents, move on. But how satisfying is that, either for you or for the client? It's efficient, yes, but it's also mechanical: fact provider meets with fact analyzer; provider provides, analyzer analyzes, and presto! a solution is produced. It's not the kind of work that makes for happy lawyers or clients.

Really listening means much more than merely accepting a long list of facts at face value and finding in them a pattern that indicates a standard solution. It also means:

• Listening with what Zen Buddhists call "beginner's mind": that is, as if you are listening for the very first time; everything is new, and nothing is taken for granted.

• Listening through the client's role playing: Clients behave according to their own concepts of how a client is supposed to behave. That concept acts as a filter, allowing certain facts, ideas, and feelings to be expressed and others-those deemed to be inappropriate or irrelevant-to be withheld.

• Listening in order to learn from the client: If you stop as soon as you get "the" answer, you may be closing yourself off to better options. Perhaps the client knows a way to resolve the problem that is outside your experience. Let yourself be open to signs of wisdom that may bear fruit.

• Listening to help the client hear himself: This is where the practice known as active listening can be particularly helpful. By feeding back to the client what it is you think you heard him saying-that is, the meaning you think you heard-you give him the opportunity both to clarify what he really meant and, if he is willing, to hear things he may have been unaware of.

• Listening for the client's own listening problems: Clients who don't listen can be maddening. They waste time and fail to give useful feedback. Being aware of this problem gives you an opportunity to deal with it-preferably directly, but with tact-before it leads to abject frustration or even rage. And, keep in mind that encouraging clients to become better listeners can pay off. Their experience causes them to pick up on different things from the ones you perceive, things you might miss that could have a direct bearing on the case.

• Listening to your own intuition: The legal culture doesn't exactly embrace this source of knowledge, but that doesn't mean that your hunches and inklings shouldn't be respected and explored. If your gut tells you something is wrong with the picture, check it out.
• (Chapter includes stories, tips/suggestions and exercises on how to implement a deeper emphasis on listening in your law practice.)